Nostalgic

One wedding dinner and I felt part of the shift lab again. 

There were only 6 of us sitting at a 10 person table but it was good conversation (and an overload of food). The talk and laughter that flowed freely across the table, to me, was something that was available to them every working day; whereas for me, it was a rare luxury.

The girls in my new lab (and the only guy) are really nice. All of them have in some way or other been friendly to me and made me feel that I belong in this lab. Although I am not really 'a part of them' yet socially, I feel that I will be and I should cherish these new relationships. 

But this doesn't make me miss the good old times less. I just hope that the new people I meet and the work that I deal with in the future would be this special to me too :)

Married and beyond

So last month I stepped into part 2 of my life whereby the whole of my identity changed. At the same time I transferred out from my shift lab to the day lab too, so somehow everything felt like a new start.

I guess I couldn't have married without the help of many others, especially my sisters. Jon and I were touched by so much love shown to us by our families, relatives and friends. From the progression of the weddinng, dinner, to gifts and angpaos received, I just felt that we were so unconditionally loved, so much that it truly exceeds my capacity to repay it back. Thank you.

Two becoming one is really easier said than done. Even though we have known each other for years and even stayed in the same place, it takes a whole lot of effort, especially on my part to communicate and serve one another. Our temperaments are so different and so are our experiences in life.

Someone asked me if being married or being in a relationship is a spiritual experience, and how do you know that person is 'the one'. I think being married is the most practical and realistic experience you could ever have. And that person automatically becomes 'the one' once the marriage vows are said! The conflicts and the sacrifices are somewhat painful to make, but they are the most 'spiritual' in marriage when they become steps of obedience. We are still learning and have a long way to go.

Work is ok so far. I had some difficulties with my tests, and my annual leave conversions were messed up, but I am blessed with new colleagues, who went of the way to give me a sense of belonging, both the seniors and juniors. I hope I can contribute and learn much in my new working environment and hopeful establish strong friendships. 

That's all for now. I am so lazy to blog nowadays. I hope I continue to do so more :)

Some Wedding Prep Updates

August is slipping away, and very soon, we will be reaching 'the month before my wedding month'. People have perpetually been asking: how are the preparations going? And I will have to say: there are still things to do. 

A lot of things to do, in fact. Jon and me are currently slicing up wedding invitations, and hoping that the banquet ones make their way to their owners safely some way or other. Photo slideshows, photos to be developed for scrapbooking, songs to be confirmed, car to be rented, food to be catered, head count to be confirmed, dress and shows to prep. Not to mention last day decorations and rehearsals and whatever random stuff that comes with it.

Some kind souls have graciously offered to help, which we are encouraged by and thankful for; but it is not that easy to delegate things and not make things complicated. Meanwhile we would just have to trust in God's grace and press ok with diligence. 

So many things going through my head these days. What if I look horrible in my wedding gown? What if some guests get left out? What if things go wrong? And so I get transformed into a worry wart over a ceremony that lasts for a day (two if we consider the banquet). 

People say that the wedding day is the best day of our lives. But it is so easy to be focused on perfecting this one day until we lose sight of the decades coming ahead. Till now I have to remind myself time and again not to let the anxiety of preparing for this one day surpass my joy and anticipation of the new life ahead. The Part 2 that cleaves me from Part 1 forever. 

Thank God for Jon being so supportive and comforting, although we are both so clueless at these preparation stuff. I believe that no matter how the wedding prep turns out, as long as the bride and groom are right, everything else will be ok too :)

The Notebook

Just two days ago I watched this movie with Derrick and Joanne at our place. Derrick downloaded this 2004 film and came over to watch. It's a long time since I've watched this kind of romantic film which is supposed to leave you with a bittersweet feeling.

[Spoilers ahead]

In the film, an old man Noah reads a story to his wife Allie who does not recognize who he is. She is stricken with Alzheimer's. It was a love story, their own. A love that was young and reckless, brimming with passion. An explosive love between two people exploding with emotions. Apparently a lasting one too, as Noah did not give up on Allie, even when she did not know him. A whole day of reading grants him about 5 minutes of remembrance from Allie. Then she slipped away, leaving him heartbroken. The cycle has been repeating itself.

I don't find this love onscreen to be similar to mine. Maybe because Jon and myself (especially me) are people so laid back that we devote so little energy to passion. Something I found really heartbreaking in this movie is: if another person becomes the center of your life, once that person is taken away, your whole life collapses around you. 

Amidst all the modern day tragedies we see now, life is just too short and unpredictable. A vow on the marriage aisle may be terminated abruptedly by its closing line: till death do us part. Or even if a couple spend decades together, how fleeting those decades are. I bet for our grandparents, their memories of their youth didn't seem so far away after all.

This passage I've read from 1st Corinthians made me think:

This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away.

It says that time is so short that, no matter what we own or don't own, it is fruitless to rejoice or weep in something so temporary. Even marriage. Marrying for marital bliss or romance will only bring but a short term of happiness. But marrying unto God is something eternal that will not be taken away. In the same way, our achievements and things we have in this life, if not done unto God would amount to nil, once time has passed by and all forgotten.

Sometimes we really need to be reminded when life is beautiful, that life is short. And even when life is ugly, all these are temporal too because life is short. Yet this short life is all we get to make our choices, and determine our eternal destiny. So invest it wisely.