I Cut My Hair

I suppose only girls blog about this kind of thing. Or guys if they've shaved themselves bald or something. Even vain guys won't blog about this. They'll just take lots of 360 degree pics and post them up on their Facebook walls.

So I'm blogging about this because I don't know what to blog about. Apparently my current hairdresser and her employee have very different ideas on what '2 inches shorter' means. The last time I cut which was around CNY had me coming out with my hair looking hardly any different from before, and my room mate had to be told that I've already had a haircut. She was asking me when I was going to cut my hair (as I had been rambling on about that for a very long time), and I told her that it has already been cut.

So this time, '2 inches shorter' meant the most unobservant among my friends could spot the fact that I just cut my hair some 30 - 50 meters away. I guess the thing that made it obvious was the extensive layering that was done to it. And after the cut was finished I could see mounds of my hair on the floor. So it's nominally shoulder length now, but curling up at the ends because it's a bit thin and layered. I feel weird about it, but every one else has been assuring me it looks OK. (And Jon prefers it this way.) And it makes me look years younger than before. I don't know how to feel about that as I'm already looking a bit too young for my age.

Hmm. There are two things that I've felt like I wanted to try doing to my hair but haven't the guts to do it yet.

1. Dye it

2. Curl it (a bit)

But so far I'm ok with straight middle-length hair so I guess I'll be sticking to my safety zone for a long time.

My Third Language

I've always considered Bahasa Melayu as my third language (or fourth, if you count Chinese and Cantonese as two separate languages). Don't ask me if my first language is English or Chinese. I can't answer that because I don't know. How do you define your first language? The one you talk the most in, write the most in, or think the most in? Or was it the very first language you learned to speak? I consider Cantonese not as my first language, but rather my native language, because it was the first language I used to make sense of the world. Ironically, I'm not a native Cantonese. I'm of Teochew lineage, but yet, I don't speak a word of Teochew.

Anyway, all that nonsensical charade aside - I consider Malay to be ranked bottom of my list amongst the languages I learned in terms of competency, fluency, and self identification. I never thought much of the language except as one I was forced to learn when I was young. During primary school days it was the bane of my life (at least for the first few years). Even Chinese (which I only started using properly in primary school) was not as bad, though they always say that Chinese is one of the most difficult languages to learn. Maybe it was because I never used Malay day in and day out at that point of time, whereas Chinese and English were integrated with my daily life.

It was a bit better in secondary school when I finally found out how to properly grasp the 'laws of the language'. And it reached a point where I kept on scoring A's in my Malay essays in Form 5, and I really enjoyed essay writing in Malay because every time a new essay was assigned, I'll find ways to phrase my words that everything sounds nice and unique and grand. But my essay writing skills went downhill in Form 6, and my General Paper answers were more or less in spoken Malay, which means I write as what I speak, no nice terms and all.

Today my supervisor asked me if I could still converse in Malay (because he wasn't used to speaking it anymore, having spent many years in Singapore). I replied 'yes!' a little too animatedly, and at that point of time I rather surprised myself how much I cared about still being able to read and write in this language. In fact, although I have hardly been using Malay here in Singapore or even back home in Malaysia, hearing the language being used in public places such as fast food restaurants or MRTs reminds me that I used to be able to speak and write in this language too.

Sometimes I would even practice Malay to myself inside my head, and be surprised at the number of words I still remember. This is a little extreme, but having been out of practice for so long, I'm a little shy to use this language in public even with my Malay colleagues, so I could only practice it mentally on my own so that I do not completely lose touch of it. Somehow it means a lot to me that I can still connect to others in Malay: I don't know why, but perhaps it's because this is Singapore and I need this little connection to feel that I'm 'still a Malaysian'.

I still wish that one day, I would be able to sit down and write a proper essay in Malay that is of some use to the world. I could blog in the language, but somehow it doesn't feel natural to do so, as all the writing I used to do in Malay were fact-based and had nothing to do with sentiments at all.

Miss That Part of Life

I suddenly miss that part of life when I wake up to go for lectures, mug hard in the computer lab/c central library/ hall premises/ my room, play games in RH or visit people's rooms, and go out to eat and study in McD in the middle of the night.

The day in day out mugging wasn't that great, but I do love the little things that go along with it.

Work is all fine and dandy now, and despite whatever general complaints I see and hear, I like my job a lot; and I consider myself very fortunate to be in this job. I love the things I learn, like the things I do, and am excited about the things I will be doing.

But part of me wishes that i can return to school life - I wonder why.

Leaving 30J Kovan Road

Am leaving 30 J Kovan Road for an unknown destination in June/July, because Shu Ying is moving in with her friends. I will miss this place! Although it's probably for the better because I can move to somewhere nearer to Tuas where I work, and as a consequence save up to $60 (or more) per month, along with monthly time savings of 30 hours or so.

But I will miss Kovan loads! Everything is lovely here except the distance to work. I will miss:

• My housemates. Jerome, Wen Qiao, Yew Hong. I don't think we'll be staying together after this. But it had been so fun :( Hugglies to everyone! That's a Jerome term by the way. Things will be much less side splitting without Jerome.
• The house. It's so nice and big and spacious and cooling. And the red and orange colour schemes make everything so nice and cheery. And it's a super duperly good space-for-money deal. Our electronic keyboard would probably clog up half the living room in the next place we move to. And the rental pricing would most likely be the same, if not more.
• The neighbours. Queenie and her sister Genevieve most of all. Genevieve was just getting over her shyness and started making physical contact with me. Queenie of course is the usual chatterbox, always dressed in pink and yellow barbie dresses! And she looks out for me. Will miss them. Also their maid, the random uncles which I say hi to, and erm, the two dogs.
• The SPC gas station cashiers who are extremely friendly and polite. Sometimes it just makes my day to buy drinks over there and say hi.
• The relatively short distance to MRT, Fairprice, Hougang Food Court and Heartland Mall. It's near the bus station which I take a coach home from too. Come to think of it, I would also need to consider different balik kampung alternatives in the future.
• Nex, which is this rather new shopping complex in Serangoon that sells lots of stuff, but primarily (or so it seems), food and clothes. It has this nice selection of clothes that explains part of my impulsive contributions to Singapore's flourishing economy. And it has a public library! Enough said.
• The trips home from church in JonC's car. We won't be staying close to JonC next time. But am really really grateful to JonC for being a great companion and brother.
• The trips home in my company shuttle after afternoon shift. The bus is almost-empty, and the driver is nice (although he drives a bit too fast sometimes). I wanted to tell my colleague (who stays in Sengkang and takes that bus too), that he will soon be the only person in the bus (hence first to reach home), but I just couldn't do it today. I still need some time to come to terms with the move.

It shouldn't be difficult to find a new place to move to but the moving would be a bit of a headache as our stuff has multiplied in the past year. :S Still I believe God has a plan for us in our new place, and pray that He leads us as we prepare for move.