The LORD said to Samuel, "How long will you grieve over Saul, since I have rejected him from being king over Israel? Fill your horn with oil, and go. I will send you to Jesse the Bethlehemite, for I have provided for myself a king among his sons." - 1 Sam 16:1
I just finished chapter 15 a little earlier and it was about how Samuel told Saul that he and his household are now rejected by God due to his disobedience. Then Samuel left Saul and never saw him again. But in his heart Samuel grieved for Saul.
Somehow for various reasons, I could relate to Samuel's grieving. I don't know if it is the democracy parallel, or people and things I have placed and built hope on but have to give up and accept changes in this year. I think year 2013 hasn't been a smooth year for me. It is filled with tiny little hiccups and lots of rethinking and replanning. Lots of disappointments and setbacks. Lots of times when I don't even know what and how to pray for.
It is a lot of looking at Romans 8:28 again and again and again. Church land bid failed? Romans 8: 28. Major shifts and problems at work? Romans 8:28. Feeling unappreciated? Romans 8:28. Family issues? National issues? Personal sense of loss? Guess which verse I turn to.
It comes to a point when Romans 8:28 seems like an endless repetition, and I just wish I could flop down like Samuel and grieve and grieve over a person, an issue, or less noble things like myself. But God said a matter of factly to Samuel - 'how long more will you grieve? Move on, I have plans ahead.'
And Samuel went to appoint yet another king. How did he feel when he saw the young boy, full of the Lord's spirit of the Lord's own choosing? I believe the sight of David and the fact that David was chosen by God, and the act of anointing David did much to revive Samuel spiritually. Only by moving on, Samuel got over his grief. And so Romans 8:28 holds true. God just takes turns that we do not expect - like overturning His first anointed king for a shepherd boy who would have the lineage of the Messiah, God's own Son.
But I've never had the answer of why Saul was initially chosen only to have God 'regretting' His anointing. The humble Benjamite, who rose from the ashes into an arrogant king, later to die in such a hopeless manner. Why Saul? I guess like many other things in this world, some answers are yet to be discovered. And when we can't see His hand, we can always trust His heart.
Monday, May 6, 2013
Sunday, May 5, 2013
Democracy Died...
... and I've never felt more guilty as a conspirator.
Rigged or not. I still wish I had registered to vote.
I still believe in Romans 8: 28. I still believe that what has happened, God has allowed. I still believe that God will use what is broken, what is corrupted, and what is evil for His glory.
But I still sorrowfully mourn this blatant injustice we have to face as a nation. And more so I mourn my indifference and lack of proactiveness in not securing my rights to make this change.
Rigged or not. I still wish I had registered to vote.
I still believe in Romans 8: 28. I still believe that what has happened, God has allowed. I still believe that God will use what is broken, what is corrupted, and what is evil for His glory.
But I still sorrowfully mourn this blatant injustice we have to face as a nation. And more so I mourn my indifference and lack of proactiveness in not securing my rights to make this change.
Friday, May 3, 2013
One Day More
Just reminded of the lyrics of this song in Les Miserables:
Tomorrow we'll discover
What our God in heaven has in store!
One more dawn,
One more day,
One day more!
Praying for a country for which I have abandoned my rights to vote this year. Honestly speaking - I regret of not being prepared earlier.
May this passion for righteous ruling across the land be transformed into a greater passion for You. May the Christians who poured out their desires in electing the governing authorities for this land, show forth greater desires for You as the ultimate source of authority in their lives.
May the government of Your own will be elected, that Your glory be shown in this land. May we learn to respect and submit to You through the authority You vested in those who rule. May we have peace in our hearts through this time of flux and unrest. May we rest assured knowing all things work for the good of those who love You.
Dear God, I am thankful that all is in Your good hands. And my dear homeland, I am sorry that I am not registered and not home to see God's plan come to fruition, to be part of that plan. My vote is not home this year. But my heart and my prayers will be.
Tomorrow we'll discover
What our God in heaven has in store!
One more dawn,
One more day,
One day more!
Praying for a country for which I have abandoned my rights to vote this year. Honestly speaking - I regret of not being prepared earlier.
May this passion for righteous ruling across the land be transformed into a greater passion for You. May the Christians who poured out their desires in electing the governing authorities for this land, show forth greater desires for You as the ultimate source of authority in their lives.
May the government of Your own will be elected, that Your glory be shown in this land. May we learn to respect and submit to You through the authority You vested in those who rule. May we have peace in our hearts through this time of flux and unrest. May we rest assured knowing all things work for the good of those who love You.
Dear God, I am thankful that all is in Your good hands. And my dear homeland, I am sorry that I am not registered and not home to see God's plan come to fruition, to be part of that plan. My vote is not home this year. But my heart and my prayers will be.
Thursday, May 2, 2013
Rational Girls
Yes, what an oxymoron right.
But I always think that the only time a girl appreciates rational advice is when she asks for it. (Or when it is subtly given loaded with outwardly/emotionally expressed sympathy and concern, probably in a way only another girl or woman can give.)
As for the self-proclaimed rational girls, they are still girls the same. They do not rationalize objectively based on cold hard facts. They do not like facts to be cold and hard. They persuade themselves to overcome emotions with other kinds of emotions that are to them, superior in value or worth than the ones they are feeling. Then they make these silent decisions with themselves when they are alone and are safe and free to be themselves.
I don't think a girl can just detach herself from something, apart from receiving another emotional replacement. Some girls do it more easily because they are able to seek out these replacements for themselves and weigh its worth, therefore make the sacrifice.
Sacrifice. I never wanted to use this word for its inappropriateness. Yet that is what the irrational part of me think it is.
But I always think that the only time a girl appreciates rational advice is when she asks for it. (Or when it is subtly given loaded with outwardly/emotionally expressed sympathy and concern, probably in a way only another girl or woman can give.)
As for the self-proclaimed rational girls, they are still girls the same. They do not rationalize objectively based on cold hard facts. They do not like facts to be cold and hard. They persuade themselves to overcome emotions with other kinds of emotions that are to them, superior in value or worth than the ones they are feeling. Then they make these silent decisions with themselves when they are alone and are safe and free to be themselves.
I don't think a girl can just detach herself from something, apart from receiving another emotional replacement. Some girls do it more easily because they are able to seek out these replacements for themselves and weigh its worth, therefore make the sacrifice.
Sacrifice. I never wanted to use this word for its inappropriateness. Yet that is what the irrational part of me think it is.
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