Been talking with Jon yesterday and I realized that the blur blur and impatient and relatively immature boy has grown up a big fat lot through the years. Especially recently.
And I realized I've been left behind from his social circle, his ministries, his growth and passions. I've allowed him to grow but yet I've never joined in that growth. Except for teaching him some Chinese words I think I hardly helped much.
I miss the days when there was less dryness less apathy and more drive. To be immature to be impatient to be aggravated but all for the things of God's kingdom. I have now become emotionally stable and understanding with regards to many weaknesses of other people. I guess this is good for compassion, but on the other hand I have been apathetic toward my own apathy.
And there were some things that he saw that were so true it hurt. I seriously think if I left myself be stagnant at the little things I am doing now 'to serve', if I don't drink deep from that fountain of truth and love soon we will breach into two different roads of growth altogether and I will be left standing still in the dust.
Thank God for iron that sharpens iron. Thank God for painful reminders. Thank God for promising to sanctify me wholly as He justified me wholly, and even though the process may hurt He will have me go through it. For nothing will satisfy me more than being drawn deeper and closer to Him.
