It's a typical NUS semester. Time passes so fast that before I know it it's end of week three.
Things I'm doing now:
1. Catching up with my readings! I'm trying very hard to understand my FYP readings, but I guess I can't go too far until I've actually seen and tried the work. My professor will be contacting me to start work soon. Hopefully I'll be ready to do it by then. I'm still not even half-way through the readings. The efficiency level is so low. I'm trying to catch up with my other readings and am doing OK so far. I wonder how it will be like once lab and project meetings kick in. The horrors ahead! It is better to remain at a state of bliss as of now.
2. IHG articles. Witnessed another winning match today when our table tennis girls played against KE7. It was so close, and I today was really a day of realization - I found that I actually, in a way, liked to do match write-ups, simply because it created a new shared experience between myself and the players. I'm always so very detached from the sports teams in hall, that I have almost nothing to relate with them at all (except hear Kasun talk about handball during labs). Now I'm putting down what they do on paper, and some of my own observations and thoughts too. Our hall sports is doing so much better this year - guess there'll be a severe problem of point inflation at the end of the year! But somehow I'm not that worried, though I should be, considering my passive involvement in hall the past sem, and this current sem.
I used to think team sports are those that show the most team spirit, and are most tactical and dangerous (people getting hurt and running around and all). I think that they are harder because they need the most stamina too. But after watching table tennis, I realized that non-team sports (table tennis, badminton, tennis, squash, etc) have their own form of challenges too. All eyes are on just you and your opponent and the mental pressure you face must be so intense, because all the responsibility of winning or losing rests on your shoulder alone. A lot of quick thinking and observation of the opponent's movements must be done throughout this period of tension too.
IHG writing is quite a new experience for me - it has brought about many thoughts. I guess we just need to keep on trying new things to have new insights in life, small as they may be.
3. Preparing keyboard lessons for Shan Qi. It's a band thing - we're supposed to teach and learn, and so far, I haven't really been sharing my knowledge, whatever little of it there is. I asked both him and Hwee Shan to give me some learning objectives they wish to achieve through whatever I teach them, and once again, Shan Qi didn't fail to impress me. He already knew what he was looking for, and stated those things in detail. His outlook and thirst for learning was so professional, it made me feel like I'm almost not worthy to be teaching him. While he strives for improvement as a keyboardist or pianist, I am complacent at the standard at which I am currently at. I guess this teaching experience would be one of learning for me, as I continually observe the attitude of my juniors, and realize what are the things that make one go far, and ultimately excel.
4. Bible study. Simon talked about the fall of the walls of Jericho from a very interesting perspective. Why did Joshua curse whoever rebuilds Jericho? Jericho being situated in a very strategic position -was extremely economical for Israel. It was even a gateway into Canaan. Its walls could fortify their defence, it's potential for trade could boost their wealth. It was their first claim from the land of Canaan before many others. Why was Jericho not to be used to Israel's advantage, not to be rebuilt?
Firstly, it was the concept of 'first fruits'. Joshua and his army presented Jericho as a sacrifice to God as a first fruit - giving Him the first and best they had, not using it for their own profits. Also it was a sign of faith - their dependence was on God, not on the walls or wealth of Jericho. Not on themselves, for they had nothing, all was from God.
I love the reminder of giving up the first fruits to God. Prioritizing is so hard, and it's often so tempting to keep the best time and best gains for myself, to study, to do hall activities, to make me one a person of better quality in so many ways. But God wants the first fruits, so that He can continue to bless. He deserves the first fruits, to be held in Priority Number One, for He is so much, yet no less than that. In relationships, in working life, in school life, in every aspect. No one else can claim the throne, nor rob that that belongs to him. I do hope that I'll bear this in mind and give God the first fruits, the most precious things I can offer - time, love and faith. Not to hall, not to men, not to my studies nor the hopes of anyone else. I pray that I can be able to do that.
5. Shopping. I just went grocery and stationary shopping. I love shopping because there are so many things to see, but even in a place as small as Clementi, I have to brace all my mind and will to clearly differentiate my needs and wants. Most of the time I succumb to some of my wants, but I make sure that whatever I buy is really cheap, and in a way it's what I need too. I guess I'll have to get ready myself for this especially in the first two years of working life. Budgets have to be small and tight, and only needs can be entertained. Save, save, save! :)
That's all for today. Will continue to update next week.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Almost There
I'm almost recovering now. At least I don't get fever any more! But I'm still coughing a lot, and coughing up green phlegm. I wonder why the bruises on my arms take so long to subside though. At least now I'm able to function normally, albeit having rather weird appetite twists, and disrupting classes (though I try VERY hard not to), with spasmodic throaty (or phlegmy) coughs. Gah. It was rather embarrassing in yesterday's class in business. I shall not elaborate on that.
It's when you start functioning normally again that the amount of work you've left behind starts to pile up and crush down like mountains on you. I simply must get those FYP readings done by this weekend! Not to mention start doing my Engineering in Drug Delivery individual project, and researching for the group project. Oh, and to brainstorm for MNO's group project, which will involve quite a lot of my time too. And glancing at my time table, reality hits me into the realization that lab is starting next week (dreaded reports and vivas)! I'm going to be nocturnal very soon. Bye bye normal sleeping hours.
IHG (Inter-Hall Games) is here and being part of Phoenix, I'm covering articles for several sports. This is kind of horrible for me as I have absolutely zero experience writing sports articles (you know, who scored, and blow by blow account of what happened), besides near zero experience in playing sports too. So with my very limited vocab and experience, my articles are often lengthy, boring twists and repetitions of the words 'score', 'goal', 'chance', and bla bla bla. (Somehow I'm lucky enough to write articles for sports in which we win, hehe.) I hope the players don't get too disappointed by those rather colorless accounts of their feats.
Being on the topic of IHG, something really weird happened this week (in fact, I wonder if weird is an appropriate adjective for that, but we'll leave this point aside for now). For the first time in my entire writing life, a certain article of mine was actually thought to be 'controversial' , and I was told to be more 'politically correct' while writing next time. =.= For people who know my writing style, I have never been anything but boringly politically correct all the time! (Boss should know, it would be so much nicer for him if my articles were 'juicier' and more 'controversial'.) And the way I see it, article Whatever It Was that I wrote was just as boringly politically correct, and maybe boringly moralistic as ever (Is 'boringly' even a word?). Just because it upset a small number of people with guilty consciences means I should write to please people (who disgraces the hall through their actions)? I stated that it was my own personal opinion, but I never even wrote to condemn. The purpose of that small little paragraph in the article was to gently point out something that I hope not to see again, for the sake of the hall's reputation.
That aside, I felt it was good anyway, that people think it's controversial. I have gained no enemies, and so far no one has attempted to edit/remove the said article, so the more 'controversial' it is labelled, the more it will attract readers. Which brings me to remember that once, in my blog, I said something about a senior, and a whole bunch of other seniors added me on MSN just to gain permission to access my blog in Windows Live Spaces to read it. That is the level of inquisitiveness of the people in hall. And by the way, the paragraph above this one, is at least 10 times as controversial as compared to the little paragraph that was deemed to be so. So be prepared to be disappointed if you actually want to go and read it after reading this (just the way those seniors who addded me on MSN are). No hard feelings towards people who still feel the article is on the controversial end though. I guess we're just looking at the issue at very different perspectives.
The new hall freshmen have settled in very quickly, but I haven't really got to know them. I guess I am anti-social, or just sick, or too busy (or finding excuses). One day I'll come back finding Raffles Hall a different place, with different people. Sometimes, being in hall for so long, I do wonder what connects me to hall. Is it the people, whose faces change year in and year out, or is it the lifestyle, the buildings, the comfortable little circle of friends I keep? Is it hall spirit, that is ebbing out of me as I go higher up in NUS, revived only when I participate whole-heartedly in the Aspiration Cheer?
That's why I think all residents should, if they go down to support a sport, go down to cheer for RH Handball. Not because it's one of our very rare sports that go into the finals - but that's the place you find most Rafflesians turn up to cheer, to be excited, and most of all, to be united for a common cause. Another event that I really feel for is Rag Day, when we cheer for Float and wait for results together. Other events are just more scattered, and even if the passion is there, the people are not.
Ahh well. Enough thoughts for today. :) The nodding Winnie the Pooh handphone holder Mable gave me is studying his book diligently (at least he looks like he's doing so), so I should follow his example too.
It's when you start functioning normally again that the amount of work you've left behind starts to pile up and crush down like mountains on you. I simply must get those FYP readings done by this weekend! Not to mention start doing my Engineering in Drug Delivery individual project, and researching for the group project. Oh, and to brainstorm for MNO's group project, which will involve quite a lot of my time too. And glancing at my time table, reality hits me into the realization that lab is starting next week (dreaded reports and vivas)! I'm going to be nocturnal very soon. Bye bye normal sleeping hours.
IHG (Inter-Hall Games) is here and being part of Phoenix, I'm covering articles for several sports. This is kind of horrible for me as I have absolutely zero experience writing sports articles (you know, who scored, and blow by blow account of what happened), besides near zero experience in playing sports too. So with my very limited vocab and experience, my articles are often lengthy, boring twists and repetitions of the words 'score', 'goal', 'chance', and bla bla bla. (Somehow I'm lucky enough to write articles for sports in which we win, hehe.) I hope the players don't get too disappointed by those rather colorless accounts of their feats.
Being on the topic of IHG, something really weird happened this week (in fact, I wonder if weird is an appropriate adjective for that, but we'll leave this point aside for now). For the first time in my entire writing life, a certain article of mine was actually thought to be 'controversial' , and I was told to be more 'politically correct' while writing next time. =.= For people who know my writing style, I have never been anything but boringly politically correct all the time! (Boss should know, it would be so much nicer for him if my articles were 'juicier' and more 'controversial'.) And the way I see it, article Whatever It Was that I wrote was just as boringly politically correct, and maybe boringly moralistic as ever (Is 'boringly' even a word?). Just because it upset a small number of people with guilty consciences means I should write to please people (who disgraces the hall through their actions)? I stated that it was my own personal opinion, but I never even wrote to condemn. The purpose of that small little paragraph in the article was to gently point out something that I hope not to see again, for the sake of the hall's reputation.
That aside, I felt it was good anyway, that people think it's controversial. I have gained no enemies, and so far no one has attempted to edit/remove the said article, so the more 'controversial' it is labelled, the more it will attract readers. Which brings me to remember that once, in my blog, I said something about a senior, and a whole bunch of other seniors added me on MSN just to gain permission to access my blog in Windows Live Spaces to read it. That is the level of inquisitiveness of the people in hall. And by the way, the paragraph above this one, is at least 10 times as controversial as compared to the little paragraph that was deemed to be so. So be prepared to be disappointed if you actually want to go and read it after reading this (just the way those seniors who addded me on MSN are). No hard feelings towards people who still feel the article is on the controversial end though. I guess we're just looking at the issue at very different perspectives.
The new hall freshmen have settled in very quickly, but I haven't really got to know them. I guess I am anti-social, or just sick, or too busy (or finding excuses). One day I'll come back finding Raffles Hall a different place, with different people. Sometimes, being in hall for so long, I do wonder what connects me to hall. Is it the people, whose faces change year in and year out, or is it the lifestyle, the buildings, the comfortable little circle of friends I keep? Is it hall spirit, that is ebbing out of me as I go higher up in NUS, revived only when I participate whole-heartedly in the Aspiration Cheer?
That's why I think all residents should, if they go down to support a sport, go down to cheer for RH Handball. Not because it's one of our very rare sports that go into the finals - but that's the place you find most Rafflesians turn up to cheer, to be excited, and most of all, to be united for a common cause. Another event that I really feel for is Rag Day, when we cheer for Float and wait for results together. Other events are just more scattered, and even if the passion is there, the people are not.
Ahh well. Enough thoughts for today. :) The nodding Winnie the Pooh handphone holder Mable gave me is studying his book diligently (at least he looks like he's doing so), so I should follow his example too.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
On Road To Recovery
... or so I hope. Had been pretty wrong when I thought all was left was the cough in my past blog entry. :S
Went to see another doctor in UHWC on Monday. The previous doctor whom I saw on Friday asked me to do a blood test first before anything else so I did. I don't know why but I have this incomprehensible fear towards blood tests. I know it doesn't hurt that much and all, but somehow I hate the idea of people taking blood out of my body. The blood test done on Friday left me with a bruise on my left hand, so the nurse decided to do this one on my right. She was very kind, and explained that the bruise was because I haven't been pressing on the wound hard enough after the blood test was done.
I didn't really expect to have the test done on my right hand so I had to brace myself for it. And the nurse saw how nervous I was, so she used the typical tactic of asking 101 questions on how I was feeling and which doctor I was seeing, etc. She had my blood out quick enough, and I gingerly took it to the lab.
The doctor thought my problem was only bacteria infection in my throat at first, and told me that the blood test needn't be done at all, and it was an 'uneccessary puncture'. But when she caught sight of my high white blood cells percentage (20 over percent, I think usually it's around 1 percent or something), she asked me to do another blood test! I almost fainted. When the nurse in charge saw it was me again, she went over to the lab to check if the test was really necessary. Sadly it was. So now I have three bruise prints on both my arms. I suppose I still haven't gotten the art of pressing my wounds well enough.
Doctor concluded that my problem was viral infection. Or something like mononucleotide glandular infection. I was very, very tired all day. And kept coughing non-stop. Sweated a lot at night. Couldn't sleep in the day. I couldn't eat more than a quarter of my dinner, found climbing stairs hard, and couldn't concentrate in the classes that I didn't skip. It was terrible. Viral infection does take time to heal. The worst was at night when I tried to fall asleep, and I hallucinated (thinking I'm supposed to cough my phelgm into test tubes, aliens, pillow turning into cucumber!), coughed, tossed, turned, and sweated until it was almost morning, before I could finally fall asleep.
Thank God for protecting Tirza from ALL my germs throughout this period. These two weeks are light for me but not for her. She tapao-ed my dinner, slept through (I dunno how but somehow she did) my thunderous coughing, and did not catch any of my sicknesses. And she lent me Catherine Marshall to read too, which I finished yesterday. Was a very nice and encouraging book, especially when you're ill.
Today my energy level is finally higher than before, so hopefully my condition had turned for the better. I managed to have my first proper meal yesterday, which was pretty good (though I vomited a bit of my porridge out in the end). Finished lunch and attempting dinner today :) It's such a blessing to be able to eat normal food! I missed what popo used to cook when I was young and had fever. The mee in soup with ikan bilis inside, or the porridge with fish. Super nice la! Now my number one diet when I don't feel like eating anything is milk, Koko Krunch and Ah Gong's prunes haha!
I started printing my FYP readings which proved to be more horrendous than I expected. Hopefully I'll get started and finish them up good and early before my supervisor asks me about them. I'm lucky to work under a nice professor this year. The project is about bacteria genome reconstruction - and it's a calculation based project. Guess I shouldn't go too deep into what it's about here in a public blog, in case it's supposed to be secret or anything. But it does look interesting! :)
I want to get well soon and live a normal life! Jerome has been covering all IHG articles everyone can't take now, and I feel bad not helping haha. And I'm so out of hall dinners and hall activities (though it is a nice change lazing in the room instead of going down for activities). And my module readings which I haven't even printed. :S Argh. I have been numbed from the life of a Chem Engineering student for over a week, and now everything is coming back to haunt me. Thank God this semester I'm not doing Industrial Attachment after all. How in the world am I going to survive living like a zombie and resting for over a week, if two days MC is all I could get!
Went to see another doctor in UHWC on Monday. The previous doctor whom I saw on Friday asked me to do a blood test first before anything else so I did. I don't know why but I have this incomprehensible fear towards blood tests. I know it doesn't hurt that much and all, but somehow I hate the idea of people taking blood out of my body. The blood test done on Friday left me with a bruise on my left hand, so the nurse decided to do this one on my right. She was very kind, and explained that the bruise was because I haven't been pressing on the wound hard enough after the blood test was done.
I didn't really expect to have the test done on my right hand so I had to brace myself for it. And the nurse saw how nervous I was, so she used the typical tactic of asking 101 questions on how I was feeling and which doctor I was seeing, etc. She had my blood out quick enough, and I gingerly took it to the lab.
The doctor thought my problem was only bacteria infection in my throat at first, and told me that the blood test needn't be done at all, and it was an 'uneccessary puncture'. But when she caught sight of my high white blood cells percentage (20 over percent, I think usually it's around 1 percent or something), she asked me to do another blood test! I almost fainted. When the nurse in charge saw it was me again, she went over to the lab to check if the test was really necessary. Sadly it was. So now I have three bruise prints on both my arms. I suppose I still haven't gotten the art of pressing my wounds well enough.
Doctor concluded that my problem was viral infection. Or something like mononucleotide glandular infection. I was very, very tired all day. And kept coughing non-stop. Sweated a lot at night. Couldn't sleep in the day. I couldn't eat more than a quarter of my dinner, found climbing stairs hard, and couldn't concentrate in the classes that I didn't skip. It was terrible. Viral infection does take time to heal. The worst was at night when I tried to fall asleep, and I hallucinated (thinking I'm supposed to cough my phelgm into test tubes, aliens, pillow turning into cucumber!), coughed, tossed, turned, and sweated until it was almost morning, before I could finally fall asleep.
Thank God for protecting Tirza from ALL my germs throughout this period. These two weeks are light for me but not for her. She tapao-ed my dinner, slept through (I dunno how but somehow she did) my thunderous coughing, and did not catch any of my sicknesses. And she lent me Catherine Marshall to read too, which I finished yesterday. Was a very nice and encouraging book, especially when you're ill.
Today my energy level is finally higher than before, so hopefully my condition had turned for the better. I managed to have my first proper meal yesterday, which was pretty good (though I vomited a bit of my porridge out in the end). Finished lunch and attempting dinner today :) It's such a blessing to be able to eat normal food! I missed what popo used to cook when I was young and had fever. The mee in soup with ikan bilis inside, or the porridge with fish. Super nice la! Now my number one diet when I don't feel like eating anything is milk, Koko Krunch and Ah Gong's prunes haha!
I started printing my FYP readings which proved to be more horrendous than I expected. Hopefully I'll get started and finish them up good and early before my supervisor asks me about them. I'm lucky to work under a nice professor this year. The project is about bacteria genome reconstruction - and it's a calculation based project. Guess I shouldn't go too deep into what it's about here in a public blog, in case it's supposed to be secret or anything. But it does look interesting! :)
I want to get well soon and live a normal life! Jerome has been covering all IHG articles everyone can't take now, and I feel bad not helping haha. And I'm so out of hall dinners and hall activities (though it is a nice change lazing in the room instead of going down for activities). And my module readings which I haven't even printed. :S Argh. I have been numbed from the life of a Chem Engineering student for over a week, and now everything is coming back to haunt me. Thank God this semester I'm not doing Industrial Attachment after all. How in the world am I going to survive living like a zombie and resting for over a week, if two days MC is all I could get!
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Sick in Week 1
It's week one of my 6th Semester in NUS and I started it downing Panadol pills :(
The headache started on Sunday night when I was back from Kow Fu's house. I didn't know what it was then but yesterday I managed to conclude that it was heat stroke. The cause was rather stupid - I just spent less than a few minutes under the sun (but it was really blazing hot that afternoon), coupled with lack of rest due to room moving and unpacking. I guess I should really have slept instead of unpack my room before going out again at night, but I didn't know it would make me that tired the whole night. It was quite a strain to open my eyes as it got later (but I must say dinner was really superb). And when I was home I was down with a headache, and a body simmering with internal heat.
Monday was worse. Still feeling the heat and headache, couldn't sleep too, though I tried for hours and hours all through the day. Also, a couple of admin issues in school added to the stress, plus other personal stuff. The weird thing about my feeling hot was the heat was all inside me, but my skin was at a normal temperature. It was very bad. I couldn't eat much dinner. I couldn't do work at all, and FYP balloting has to be submitted in two days. :(
Tuesday. Went to Chinatown to buy bus tickets around 9 something in the morning, before they run out. Had breakfast in Chinatown - and again couldn't finish my food AND drinks. (The cleaners must think I'm a horrible food waster or something). Fortunately Chinatown wasn't too far away from NUS... the whole trip back and forth amounted to around 3 hours only. And there were bus tickets left so I could go back home with Yew Hong and friends. Thanks Yew Hong for calling me to give directions, and for replying the tonnes of sms's I sent. :S
After coming back from Chinatown I had a business lecture from 3-6 pm. The lecturer was a handsome German, very friendly too. Once my classmates knew class participation was 25%, there were enthusiastic remarks from beginning to end (especially the SEP students). Me? With phelgm stuck in my throat (yes I was having cough and cold as well), as well as a body both freezing and burning (air-con was cold but I was hot, yet I was shivering), I couldn't bring myself to say (or think of what to say anything at all). In the end what I did was riase a hand indicating that I was the only Malaysian in class, and ask the lecturer one (rather stupid) question at the end of the class. Sigh. But it was a nice course and a nice lecture. Will elaborate about it in other blog posts.
RHOC chose to have an ice-cream party at night - and I had to settle FYP balloting in that very night too. I had to forgo the ice-cream, but Jon did bring a bit up after it ended. What a horrible task it was to just select 15 projects out of 128 and rank them. You might just end up with any of your choices so I don't want to be doing something that results in my tearing of hair, and gnashing of teeth. After a very small dinner (rarrr going to lose more weight) I went to sleep for an hour or so waking up to feel hot all over. The heat had finally moved from inside my body to near skin surface (like typical fever). It was then that I knew I had a heat stroke. It wasn't nice, but I felt quite relieved knowing what it was. I settled the projects after a few hours, feeling rather brain dead. One big load off my shoulders.
I tried drinking 'liang cha' to reduce my body heat, but then it worsened my cough (cough virus is really rampant in NUS now. Even my professor was coughing.) Pei Pa Koa wasn't effective enough. Hence the deadly resort: Panadol, after tossing for an hour or so on bed (poor Tirza, I was quite noisy). And today my temperature is gone. Cough and blocked nose still lingering though. Hope they'll be gone soon enough too. And I do hope my appetite will come back. I couldn't finish the porridge I had for breakfast this morning, and it really wasn't a lot.
I think I haven't really blogged about being sick before. Thank God this is week 1 and all the late night mugging and stuff hadn't started yet. However, there were hall activities like block initiation this week, and I acted really anti-socially, even during hall dinners. :( I will still need to go out to settle some personal issues these few days, so I'm really glad I have no more fever. :) Now I'll work hard to get rid of the cough instead.
The headache started on Sunday night when I was back from Kow Fu's house. I didn't know what it was then but yesterday I managed to conclude that it was heat stroke. The cause was rather stupid - I just spent less than a few minutes under the sun (but it was really blazing hot that afternoon), coupled with lack of rest due to room moving and unpacking. I guess I should really have slept instead of unpack my room before going out again at night, but I didn't know it would make me that tired the whole night. It was quite a strain to open my eyes as it got later (but I must say dinner was really superb). And when I was home I was down with a headache, and a body simmering with internal heat.
Monday was worse. Still feeling the heat and headache, couldn't sleep too, though I tried for hours and hours all through the day. Also, a couple of admin issues in school added to the stress, plus other personal stuff. The weird thing about my feeling hot was the heat was all inside me, but my skin was at a normal temperature. It was very bad. I couldn't eat much dinner. I couldn't do work at all, and FYP balloting has to be submitted in two days. :(
Tuesday. Went to Chinatown to buy bus tickets around 9 something in the morning, before they run out. Had breakfast in Chinatown - and again couldn't finish my food AND drinks. (The cleaners must think I'm a horrible food waster or something). Fortunately Chinatown wasn't too far away from NUS... the whole trip back and forth amounted to around 3 hours only. And there were bus tickets left so I could go back home with Yew Hong and friends. Thanks Yew Hong for calling me to give directions, and for replying the tonnes of sms's I sent. :S
After coming back from Chinatown I had a business lecture from 3-6 pm. The lecturer was a handsome German, very friendly too. Once my classmates knew class participation was 25%, there were enthusiastic remarks from beginning to end (especially the SEP students). Me? With phelgm stuck in my throat (yes I was having cough and cold as well), as well as a body both freezing and burning (air-con was cold but I was hot, yet I was shivering), I couldn't bring myself to say (or think of what to say anything at all). In the end what I did was riase a hand indicating that I was the only Malaysian in class, and ask the lecturer one (rather stupid) question at the end of the class. Sigh. But it was a nice course and a nice lecture. Will elaborate about it in other blog posts.
RHOC chose to have an ice-cream party at night - and I had to settle FYP balloting in that very night too. I had to forgo the ice-cream, but Jon did bring a bit up after it ended. What a horrible task it was to just select 15 projects out of 128 and rank them. You might just end up with any of your choices so I don't want to be doing something that results in my tearing of hair, and gnashing of teeth. After a very small dinner (rarrr going to lose more weight) I went to sleep for an hour or so waking up to feel hot all over. The heat had finally moved from inside my body to near skin surface (like typical fever). It was then that I knew I had a heat stroke. It wasn't nice, but I felt quite relieved knowing what it was. I settled the projects after a few hours, feeling rather brain dead. One big load off my shoulders.
I tried drinking 'liang cha' to reduce my body heat, but then it worsened my cough (cough virus is really rampant in NUS now. Even my professor was coughing.) Pei Pa Koa wasn't effective enough. Hence the deadly resort: Panadol, after tossing for an hour or so on bed (poor Tirza, I was quite noisy). And today my temperature is gone. Cough and blocked nose still lingering though. Hope they'll be gone soon enough too. And I do hope my appetite will come back. I couldn't finish the porridge I had for breakfast this morning, and it really wasn't a lot.
I think I haven't really blogged about being sick before. Thank God this is week 1 and all the late night mugging and stuff hadn't started yet. However, there were hall activities like block initiation this week, and I acted really anti-socially, even during hall dinners. :( I will still need to go out to settle some personal issues these few days, so I'm really glad I have no more fever. :) Now I'll work hard to get rid of the cough instead.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
My Autograph Albums
I just saw my two autograph albums which I let my classmates write in when I was in Form 5 and Upper 6 on a heap of books. I was glad that I bothered to start letting people write in those - though it was quite troublesome to keep track of where they went, and who has been keeping it for weeks and never returned them. Those two books made me miss my old classmates so much. Or rather, miss those times when we have been classmates.
I really enjoyed my Form 6 years. The two years where I've started to 'open up' instead being 'unusually quiet' in school, as quoted by my classmates. Actually I don't think I'm that unusually quiet myself, it's just that the people I mixed with during my Form 5 days are generally non-Chinese, and my social circle was indeed a rather small one. I mixed more with the Chinese when I was in Form 6. What else can one do when over 80% of the class were Chinese? That was when they had the impression that I was opening up socially.
It's funny to see how people used to think of you in those years, things that you thought you'd always remember but eventually forget. Everybody used to say that I was freakingly smart but quiet, until I started joining in the Ting Fang kepo gang, and of course, helped the others with their school work. I miss those days in the library when all of us used it as a sort of meeting ground besides the classroom, pore over the revision books inside. And then we as the library committee would have to clean the shelves and rearrange the books. The library was my favorite place in school. I'm not that hardworking myself, but being surrounded by books is a nice feeling. It almost makes you feel more hardworking then you actually were.
My capacity to care for my classmates during those days was so much wider than what I have now. Much deeper and wider. It made me happy to help them, and to talk to them, and to just be with them. University life has changed me so much. The stressfulness, the reminders of my mother not to waste time which still stuck firmly until today, and the competitiveness of my course had contributed to this change. I try to reach out to my friends as I did before, but it was not so genuine, and not as frequent as I would have done in those days. I guess this is what it means to know a person's true colours just by putting them into a tight spot. I failed this litmus test.
People used to try and avoid going through Form 6, but I thought it was a good learning process. To stay for two more years at home before venturing outside. To stretch yourself beyond what you think you can. To have two more years to lead the school in whatever posts you're in (being the eldest in the school). And that part of me, seen through the eyes of my classmates, have been recorded in those autograph albums, as a reminder that there is no time when it is ok to stop serving God, to stop having a big heart, to stop dreaming dreams. There's no end to a life of stress in Singapore, but even when fighting to grow intellectually, there's no use draining all resources to do that, neglecting the need to go spiritually, emotionally, and socially. Easier said then done though.
After looking back, one must look forward. I do with the hope that I can be once again the someone I used to be once upon a time, and even strive to be someone better than that in the future. There is this need to grow in those areas, and I shall draw on God's strength to do it this year :)
I really enjoyed my Form 6 years. The two years where I've started to 'open up' instead being 'unusually quiet' in school, as quoted by my classmates. Actually I don't think I'm that unusually quiet myself, it's just that the people I mixed with during my Form 5 days are generally non-Chinese, and my social circle was indeed a rather small one. I mixed more with the Chinese when I was in Form 6. What else can one do when over 80% of the class were Chinese? That was when they had the impression that I was opening up socially.
It's funny to see how people used to think of you in those years, things that you thought you'd always remember but eventually forget. Everybody used to say that I was freakingly smart but quiet, until I started joining in the Ting Fang kepo gang, and of course, helped the others with their school work. I miss those days in the library when all of us used it as a sort of meeting ground besides the classroom, pore over the revision books inside. And then we as the library committee would have to clean the shelves and rearrange the books. The library was my favorite place in school. I'm not that hardworking myself, but being surrounded by books is a nice feeling. It almost makes you feel more hardworking then you actually were.
My capacity to care for my classmates during those days was so much wider than what I have now. Much deeper and wider. It made me happy to help them, and to talk to them, and to just be with them. University life has changed me so much. The stressfulness, the reminders of my mother not to waste time which still stuck firmly until today, and the competitiveness of my course had contributed to this change. I try to reach out to my friends as I did before, but it was not so genuine, and not as frequent as I would have done in those days. I guess this is what it means to know a person's true colours just by putting them into a tight spot. I failed this litmus test.
People used to try and avoid going through Form 6, but I thought it was a good learning process. To stay for two more years at home before venturing outside. To stretch yourself beyond what you think you can. To have two more years to lead the school in whatever posts you're in (being the eldest in the school). And that part of me, seen through the eyes of my classmates, have been recorded in those autograph albums, as a reminder that there is no time when it is ok to stop serving God, to stop having a big heart, to stop dreaming dreams. There's no end to a life of stress in Singapore, but even when fighting to grow intellectually, there's no use draining all resources to do that, neglecting the need to go spiritually, emotionally, and socially. Easier said then done though.
After looking back, one must look forward. I do with the hope that I can be once again the someone I used to be once upon a time, and even strive to be someone better than that in the future. There is this need to grow in those areas, and I shall draw on God's strength to do it this year :)
Friday, January 1, 2010
2010
It's the first day of the new year and since yesterday, my blogger dashboard has been filled up with entries with themes that sum up the last day of the past year, and (optimistic) new entries regarding year 2010. :) Sadly, the only time that I feel that a 'new year' is here is during August, when it is a start of a new academic year for me. Sigh. It is horrible the way my life is still centered around studies (psychologically, I'm not mugging away now) even when it's holidays and it's a start of a brand new year!
I don't have much go blog about my new year resolutions and such - because I've been too lazy to make any, and prefer to take things one step at a time. The new year does have a small degree of impact on me though. It makes me feel a year older (though by the time you're past 21 you don't really feel your age on you anymore, it just goes on and on), and it does give a tint of hope that this year your life will be better - change of outlook and all. I've been rather a spiritual failure in 2009 and have gotten myself in a mess here and there. I do hope for a change in that area this year.
I'm verbally translating pastor's message from English to Chinese again, and I feel that the results would be much, much better if I had to do it the other way round. Singapore is, I'm ashamed to say, turning me into a banana. For the sake of those who don't know what 'bananas' are, it simply means yellow on the outside, but white inside - a Chinese that doesn't know Chinese. The environment around me is so minimally Chinese (at least in the spoken and written sense), that I've hardly been using it at all. And it's so much faster to type in English! Fortunately I have pastor's notes with me a little earlier, and it's not too hard to translate this time.
CORS bidding is here - the bidding system which we're supposed to use some points to secure our university modules. The modules I intend to take are surprisingly unpopular at this point of time, meaning the vacancies are more than the number of students bidding for them. However, I fear the usual 'last minute rush' where bids pour in at the last minute, bringing the bid points of certain modules sky high. And it's so hard to decide which final year project to pick and ballot for!
I guess my brain is really on holiday now. Usually I do not have to think much while blogging and the thoughts just flow. Today it's stuck in stages. Oh well, may it get the well-required rest it deserves before the coming semester :) Will blog more when I get the train of thoughts unplugged!
I don't have much go blog about my new year resolutions and such - because I've been too lazy to make any, and prefer to take things one step at a time. The new year does have a small degree of impact on me though. It makes me feel a year older (though by the time you're past 21 you don't really feel your age on you anymore, it just goes on and on), and it does give a tint of hope that this year your life will be better - change of outlook and all. I've been rather a spiritual failure in 2009 and have gotten myself in a mess here and there. I do hope for a change in that area this year.
I'm verbally translating pastor's message from English to Chinese again, and I feel that the results would be much, much better if I had to do it the other way round. Singapore is, I'm ashamed to say, turning me into a banana. For the sake of those who don't know what 'bananas' are, it simply means yellow on the outside, but white inside - a Chinese that doesn't know Chinese. The environment around me is so minimally Chinese (at least in the spoken and written sense), that I've hardly been using it at all. And it's so much faster to type in English! Fortunately I have pastor's notes with me a little earlier, and it's not too hard to translate this time.
CORS bidding is here - the bidding system which we're supposed to use some points to secure our university modules. The modules I intend to take are surprisingly unpopular at this point of time, meaning the vacancies are more than the number of students bidding for them. However, I fear the usual 'last minute rush' where bids pour in at the last minute, bringing the bid points of certain modules sky high. And it's so hard to decide which final year project to pick and ballot for!
I guess my brain is really on holiday now. Usually I do not have to think much while blogging and the thoughts just flow. Today it's stuck in stages. Oh well, may it get the well-required rest it deserves before the coming semester :) Will blog more when I get the train of thoughts unplugged!
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