Thursday, August 19, 2010

My second last week 2

I been working for almost two months now. A third of my internship experience is going to be over by next week!

Classes have started, and now it's week two. I have three main academic commitments now. The first one is my industrial attachment, the second being the other two evening modules I'm taking, and the last is my post FYP project work that I'm helping Prof Lee to do. Hence, it still doesn't really feel like school has started since all these three somehow don't merge together to make one semester. It's like oil and water, really. And oh, there's hall. I still don't know how active/passive I want to be in hall this semester.

It's been a long time since I've felt 'alone', but now I'm feeling it all over again at work. Thankfully after years of being a loner in primary and secondary school (I was a loner in varying degrees then), it didn't really affect me much. I do have people to lunch with me, but I'm still a very separate component because I'm hardly included in conversations and I don't feel like pushing myself in. But still, I really, really appreciate the ladies' lunch group I'm in now! At least it's company, and even by just listening to conversations, I do learn more things about what's happening around me.

Still I feel very much alone right after I get on the bus until I leave the office. My supervisor is really very kind and nice. But she has her own social circle, and she wants me to be independent. Which means I work alone (unless I ask for her help to teach me stuff), and go about everything else alone. It's very different, but in a way it makes me independent I guess. Not socially reliant, not academically reliant. And I'm learning to be independent in self-control also.

There's really a lot of self-restraint and self-monitoring I need to exercise in the office. Whether you know it or not, I'm actually a lazy bum by nature (many can attest to that). I like to finish my work quickly, so that I settle my tasks one after another both on time, and ahead of time. It really takes much effort not to be sloppy and double-check what I've done. It also takes a lot of effort NOT to always check my mail and Facebook. Well I've sort of conquered the Facebook part (took lots of willpower too, that), and I check my mails during breakfast and lunch times (which are officially not work timings). I try not to reply to my private mail at all during work unless it's really urgent.

Other forms of self-control include waking up in the morning (sigh...), and NOT going back before I should in the office. It's extremely tempting to do that when my supervisor's on leave and I have nothing at all to do anyway. Usually I stuff my time forcing myself to read SOPs instead. Also, it's very tempting to take short-cuts sometimes when doing work. I forgot what specific examples there were but there were such cases. I remember that happening right on the first few days I had new assignments itself. It was then I made a pact with myself that I should be entirely transparent with my supervisor regarding work issues, and not take shortcuts unless I let her know first. That has sustained me until now.

I guess work is really a good time for me to know my weakness, and to face them, as well as eventually overcome them bit by bit. I have six months to do that. Hopefully that will be sufficient.

Pastor's message last Sunday really shed a new light into my working life. I always knew that we have to submissive to our 'masters' at work from the book of Ephesians. But I didn't notice the part that says, we should do as though doing unto Jesus, because Jesus is our true Master. So we can actually serve Jesus at work each and everyday by being a good testimony, not talking behind the backs of our bosses/ superiors/ colleagues, and doing our work best as we can, just like doing it for Jesus! I used to be proud to be part of MSD, a great organization bringing the best healthcare products to patients to the best of it's ability. But now I'm no longer working for MSD, I'm working for Jesus!

We learned about lifetime employability in our HR class (as opposed to lifetime employment). People who live and work for Jesus will have lifetime employment because they serve one Master, as well as lifetime employability because of the way they serve their Master! I believe that if one whole-heartedly serves Christ as Master in the workplace, they can serve in any job they are in well. For Christ is not only the person we're serving, He's also our source of strength in serving! Just this thought makes working so much more exciting. Indeed it has kept me going for the week :)

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